Poor physical health, housing hell, unemployment, loneliness, violence, relationship problems all have contributed to times in my life when I have not been able to cope and have been mentally unwell.   I have not always done something positive to get help either – like admitting there was a problem or accepting offers of help that were made.  Sometimes I was told I had a problem by others when I hadn’t. The stigma about mental health issues is so vast that it is used as a weapon.  I eventually got through stuff or got help or got out of situations that were causing the very dark holes that I have gotten myself in.  And I know I will probably actually make that definitely have to face it again.

But whilst I have been able to get help for the physical diseases that I have had during in my life the supports for helping me cope with my head were not as visible, accessible, attractive or practical.  And I don’t know what has changed other than talking to your GP and hoping for a practical response or in my case having someone who saw me as a person rather than a condition.

When are we going to see facilities for promoting good mental health or working towards it on the main streets of our cities and towns and not up a hill or down the back of another facility or called a ‘unit’?   When am I going to stop seeing and talking about mental health and physical health as separate issues – when they all become part of the same health system delivered in the one service and one building, with one minister and no stigma.  When the solutions are freely available to all universally including talk therapies.

I have watched those who have survived the system and worked with others and built movements and circles of support, it’s something I encourage other people with physical disabilities I work with to develop in their lives to help them experience independent living.   I have also praised other campaigns which aim to reduce the stigma but I have never publicly come forward myself and said ‘me too’ and ‘there’s lots of us about’ and it has to be ok to talk about our mental health and not see it as something for others or something we don’t talk about.  Thanks to Making a Ripple for the opportunity.  There are a lot of us about and more of us need to talk about the issues and what needs to be done.  Not just to help others but to change the systems that are out there and the responses of society to treating and supporting those of us who have experienced mental illhealth.

The aim of the Make a Ripple campaign is to encourage people online to share their experiences and build a community of advocates and ambassadors. You can make your ripple here.

Our country has been brought to penury alright, and will remain in penury.

Personally I do not know if anyone else can fix this. Yes the ECB and IMF will ‘fix’ it for us – and not in a good way.  But the lack of leadership in Ireland on all sides of the political divide is scary.  There are about five people in the Dáil who may be good in a government, who understand their brief before they get it and want to learn how to fix things if they don’t know and won’t be swayed by ‘Public Affairs Consultants’ on large retainers to corporate bodies or dependent on the votes of independent TD’s to stay in government.

Our banking system is broke, our economic system is in tatters but so is politics, leadership and decision making and it has been for some time.   Nobody has been able to tell us that we were in a mess and that things need to change and that yes it is going to be terrible but that they will act in the national interest rather than their own and be believable.

Candidates for an election have been selected already or will be shortly – and they are generally councillors who have worked their way up the ‘system’ or the family members of sitting TD’s – already in the system and continuing the arsing about. (Look at the Wicklow Labour Party Convention on Sunday night next if you want to see what I am talking about.)

If we remain a country who selects it’s public servants on the basis of fixing holes in roads, providing voters with a citizens information service (which is already provided for by the state) or who they were the child/wife/brother of or played GAA for then we will remain a failed nation.  We do not elect legislators or policy specialists.  We elect teachers, a few solicitors, a few doctors, publicans.  We don’t elect many scientists, CEO’s, mothers, nurses, artists, engineers, accountants, entrepreneurs, administrators, social policy researchers.

If this country is to recover we need to reform how we pick people to stand for public office, what we expect them to do and how we expect them to do it. Clientelism has got to go. We must sort out the issue of how men lead this country and women don’t want to or can’t seem to be allowed to. And stop fecking talking about quotas providing privilege and unfair advantage. It is simply un-natural in a modern world for a country to be ruled by a parliament made up of 87% men. Find a way for women who can lead and know something about running a country to be able to enter public service on behalf of their neighbours, male and female. We must find a way for all the leaders and legislators who are out there to be able to come forward, be selected, voted for and not have to climb the greasy pole to do so.  Get rid of the pole.

We also have a media that has failed us in not being able to answer the questions and sometimes being prevented in asking them.  When chairpersons of public utilities can stop the publication and investigation of stories and corruption by calling editors and making threats.  When media ownership in this country is placed in the hands of so few.  Where property sections flourished and nobody shouted stop or ridiculed those that did for talking the economy down.  It was never about people having enough, it was always about having more, wanting more, the latest ‘more’.  And it was increasingly about opinion and comment and not news or why something was being done the way it was.

All those arguments about the public versus the private sector, the haves versus the have nots, how stupid do they look now? When we see what greed, cute hoorism, turning the other cheek and then picking up the pieces by guaranteeing corrupt banks has actually done to us. This was financial BSE – banks feeding money to themselves (staff and directors) to buy developments, funding developers and offering them more like it was smarties they were giving out. Governments when they weren’t giving people tax incentives to do this were making money from these practices – cyclical systems feeding each other, and the temperature going up all the time.

We kept being told we were a rich nation, yet people still waited on hospital trollies, people died waiting for cancer to be diagnosed beause they were not ‘private patients’, basic education was far from free, transport ticketing systems could not be integrated and the Luas never joined up.  Children and adults were abused for decades in systems overseen by the state and we still could not change or enforce the laws and make sure that their rights were protected.

And then the notion of the rich country dissappeared and the banks failed. For months the European Central Bank and European Monetary bodies have been trying to get in to fix it, to get the government to admit that they made the wrong choices and that something had to be done because of the threat to other nations.  Billions were bandied about and nobody knows what a billion is anymore we owe so many of them or need so many of them to remain a nation in hock.  People outside this country speculated on our debt in the form of bonds – taking bets on us and we owed them money and it was expensive money.

Last weekend the European number-crunchers said no more and started briefing against our Government and still the denials came from Merrion Street and on international media where viewers cringed when they saw the likes of Dick Roche spinning rubbish over and over and over again.

There is still a lot of money in this country and there is still an economy. But there is also real poverty, real exclusion and a deficit of hope. There are people with disabilities worrying about whether someone will come to visit their house to get them out of bed in the morning and help them live their lives. There are families wondering how they will cope with children they can’t parent. The houses that were built and bought with mortgages that should never have been given will remain huge stressors as people can’t pay for them and worry about where they are to live.  There are people who never owned a house wondering if they ever will.  There are thousands who do not know the ECB and IMF are here and don’t want to know either. There are bags being packed and plans being made and people leaving and being lost and the pool of people to pick from to fix the country will diminish even further.

And still we have no leadership. One leader or one party is not going to fix this. Our current electoral system of checks and balances aka multiple seat constituencies has to change radically so that we can find leaders who are literate in how to do things and how to change things. And if anyone mentions needing an Obama please kick them in a place where it hurts.  If a bishop pops up his head saying we need prayer please do likewise – it won’t be long now but they will.

What happened yesterday in the RDS was something new for Ireland, 1000 people around 100 tables talking about Ireland and what the priorities for the future should be. Each table was mixed with representatives from various sectors and facilitators were trained to lead discussions and come to consensus on priorities.

The foundations of this movement are diverse and not always in agreement with each other. In fact there has been so much ‘mé feinism’ not only in the consumerist tiger economy but in progressive political and social movements that many doubt why we should place any trust in anything coming from NGO’s, Community Sector, Union and Environmental campaigns.

The groupings themselves have not been best friends either.

The Trade Unions were maybe challenged by the Community Sector for complicitness in leading us into the state we are in, the Environmental sector challenge the Community sector for not thinking about the long term.  Some of those who are not part of any movement feel they are ‘allowed in’ to take their place finally after years of feeling ignored.

Politicians of all hues are challenged by the fact that people come together to talk – from non aligned public meetings to events like Claiming Our Future where they are not in charge.  Community Development has been destroyed by the threat it posed in participative democracy, the question on value for money and for many a failure in explaining itself and telling others what it is that community development programmes actually do.

Members of political parties are also cynical about events like COF because they have to listen to opinions which they may not agree with and criticisms of the systems they are trying to get people elected to. The political elitism of the party movement frequently pays lip service to inclusion. (The elite of the community and NGO sector also pay similar lip service and will probably continue to do so.)

The agenda of yesterday’s event was more than social, economic or envrionmental – the way our country was and should be run was discussed. There were also many people there who felt that until now they were not heard. And that may just be that no political party is really listening to anyone. They are too busy talking to and at themselves.

COF is not a political party but a process of getting people all over the country to talk to each other, to set agendas and to see change. Well that’s my view/hope of it anyway. It’s new for Ireland, it has many voices and many strands within and will need firm management to make sure everyone is included. I was thrilled to see so many people with disabiltiies attending the event yesterday and would love to see sessions with people with intellectual disabilities and from the mental health sector where they could feel comfortable and included to contribute. Also more intergenerational exchange and inclusion will be vital to continue the learning and dialogue.

The other challenge for Claiming Our Future is for this idea/format/movement not to go the way of the Ideas Campaign, the yoke up in Farmleigh with the diaspora and various other ‘consultations’ and pow wows on fixing Ireland.

The use of electronic voting (with a paper trail!) to collate the thoughts in the room is something that others should also be watching. Congratulations to Charles Stanley-Smith for the development and it will be interesting to watch what happens next in the input of technology to collate opinions. Why do we need to have workshops with terribly boring feedbacks and key note speakers at events? What’s the danger in allowing people to talk to each other? Claiming Our Future may have changed a few things in the way consultations happen and people engage with each other.

After a few pages of court reports involving scraps, using false driving licences bought on the internet and making away without paying for petrol etc., I paid attention when I heard the words ‘Charges dismissed after garda admits ‘kneeing defendant in ribs.’

Three brothers from Letterkenny have had public order charges against them dismissed after a garda admitted kneeing one of them in the ribs during his arrest. The charges were dropped at Letterkenny District Court before two members of the public, who were due to give evidence about concerns relating to garda conduct, were able to do so.

The court also heard that CCTV footage fo the arrest had not been obtained by gardai despite a written request from the defence solicitor three days after the incident.

…The court heard allegations from defence solicitor Frank Dorrian that members of the public saw gardaí knee Connell Ferry in the ribs, hold him to the ground placing a knee on the back of his neck and kick him while he was on the ground. Mr Dorrian also levelled criticism at the Gardaí for jumping to the wrong conlusion without making proper inquiries and for failing to obtain CCTV from the premises that would have clearly showed the incident.

Giving evidence Garda Ian Oates admitted under cross-examination that he had kneed Connell Ferry in the ribs during a struggle in which the defendant had grabbed him by the testicles.

The case was adjourned shortly after Garda Ian Oates admitted kneeing Gerry in the ribs and when the case resumed Inspector Denis Joyce dropped the charges.

The incident that the three were charged with took place on January 24 of this year. Gardai intervened in what they said was a row between a couple, however the brothers asserted that they were out alone and that a woman began shouting at one of them after being told by one of them that the Abrakebabra was closed. The brother refused an adult caution and reinforcements were called in.

There were two members of the public in court, both who had remonstrated at the manner of the arrest and one of whom had took independent legal advice and made a statement to the Gardai protesting the manner of the arrest. Both were willing to give evidence on behalf of the defence.

Three Gardai (McKenna, Mulvihill, Morrison) gave evidence saying they did not see Mr. Ferry getting kneed in the ribs before Garda Oates made his admission under defence questioning.

The very extensive report in the Donegal News contains full coverage of the case, the failed and delayed attempts to get the CCTV coverage, and the fact that two members of the public (unconnected to the defendants) complained to the Gardai about the treatment of the defendants by the Gardai shortly after the incident had taken place.

I cannot find a link to the case report in any other media source and am not aware of it being on RTE. I assume it was reported on Highland Radio? If I cannot find it reported elsewhere to link to in the next week I’ll transcribe more of the report as it makes for interesting reading regarding the manner of the arrest and subsequent investigation.

One wonders how the case ever came to be heard at all. And what investigation will now take place?

This time I’ve been more incensed by the lies being told by the No side, by the poor campaigns run by the Yes side including the ‘Civil Society’ groups.  (One of the groups which I would exclude from this criticism is Generation Yes who didn’t do a bad job at all with very little money  from my very external viewpoint but more plaudits and pastings of the campaign after Saturday.)  Now I just want it all to be over because it does nothing for anyone.

This is because I feel Lisbon/the Reform Treaty is not really as  important as all this fuss that is be being made of it  – Nice and accession were the important decisions – the fall of the Berlin wall and everything after that has meant that the European Union needs better ways of working.

If you still have a stomach for Lisbon related material Nick McGinley explores many reasons for voting Yes and details lots of the intricacies nobody really understands because they a) can’t be bothered or/and b) have not had them presented to them in a readable manner. 100 Reasons to Vote Yes is probably not for everyone but I’m grateful it pokes fun at some of the stances taken by both sides during Lisbon I whilst explaining why people should vote Yes in Lisbon II.  I won’t hold the fact that Michael O’Leary’s handing out copies deter me from this mention Back to my own fairly uninformed thoughts…

What is being presented in this reform is not perfect, but I wish I was in the position of other EU citizens and let the Government, the commission and the parliament elected get on with things.  My vote for politicians on their European policy should be what counts.   That said the government’s unobserved and un-monitored  cap in hand to Brussels looking for those guarantees infuriates me.  Again the requirement for the Government to legislate for the X case is ignored as some pointless further guarantee is made on a lack of interference by the EU on right to life. (We’ve had that for 17 years already.)

We’re not going to be waging war on anyone or losing our so called neutrality. We have a responsibility, as small as a country we are, to make sure massacres and human rights violations throughout the world don’t go unchecked and that our voice along with other EU members are heard in both peace keeping and peace enforcing.

That as small as a country we are is important to reflect on also.  All this stuff about how a No vote will stop things and get the whole reform process started again.  Absolute rubbish.  The quality of the debate being held in Ireland on EU membership and the future of the Union is an embarrassment. The racism and intolerance that has crept into the opposition arguments is also of great concern.

I despair at the lack of understanding about the European Union and the way it works.  This lack of political education and presentation has allowed the No side gain un-deserved traction for their Chicken Licken arguments.  The parochial nature of Irish Politics is also to blame for this.

The reasons I have some understanding about the European Union maybe is because I have needed it’s institutions to progress in life be it

• the programmes sponsored by the European Social Fund which supported and trained me when for years I could not gain regular employment,
• funding for organisations and programmes that Irish governments would not fund due to discrimination and intolerance,
• equality in terms of pay and social welfare entitlements,
• freedom to travel,
• safety in terms of consumer issues and product standards,
• transport assistance at Airports that is universal in standard and quality so far (it’s fecking amazing what an EU directive has done to my quality of life as a disabled person in getting in and out of this country in the last year. )
• and on and on and on

There are more EU Directives to come that will improve the lives of myself and others – the unemployed, ‘underprivileged’, and coalface workers that Patricia McKenna says are not represented in the Yes side.  I’m a coalface worker voting Yes and I think there lots of us about.  The cuts in services and recession related issues are not the EU’s fault and it’s pure folly to try and link the fears of people affected to Lisbon.  The No side feast on the lack of information and the insularity and fear that many express due to the actions of government and effects of the collapse of the economy?

I won’t go on anymore.  I wish that in future when Treaties are being negotiated and reforms proposed that we have active dialogue and interest. That when the Oireachtas debates EU policy and legislation that those doing the debating are informed participants, the matters are reported in all forms of media and that groups representing those affected are prepared for debate and are consulted.  I’m looking forward to the navel gazing stopping and insularity ending, I doubt it will happen. If as I hope there is a majority Yes vote on Friday I’d rather we don’t close the book but actually learn something about how we are to progress our membership of the European Union in the future.

Tin hat on.

I’ve been watching a lot of it in the last few months but my addiction goes back to Spitting Image and Not the Nine O’Clock News.

Over the years I caught up on older stuff including TW3 and Halls Pictorial Weekly. Like many in the nation I was glued listening to Scrap Saturday at 10.30 on a Saturday Morning which was never ever matched by anything else in Ireland. Unfortunately I can’t find any of it on Youtube! I was fortunate not to find any clips of RTE’s poor attempts in Bull Island or State of the Nation.

Halls Pictorial Weekly

Spitting Image

Some of the best stuff the US campagin has been from Saturday Night Live – ok has been from Tina Fey!

We’ve had lots more from groups like Public Service Administration.

You can call in or text the show with your best bits and comments on your thoughts on satire in Ireland and elsewhere. I’ll be remembering Political Thicko and a few other web based Irish Satirists and wondering where the rest of ye are!!

Meanwhile commenters still visit to leave interesting tidbits.

Text messages, emails and phone calls from many of these contacts have been received this morning. (Thank you to those who weren’t laughing at me!)

I’m sorry.